To sum it all up, I must say that I regret nothing.
Now that I look back, I realize that a life predicated on being obedient and taking orders is a very comfortable life indeed. Living in such a way reduces to a minimum one's need to think.
We shall meet again. I have believed in God. I obeyed the laws of war and was loyal to my flag.
From my childhood, obedience was something I could not get out of my system. When I entered the armed service at the age of twenty-seven, I found being obedient not a bit more difficult than it had been during my life to that point. It was unthinkable that I would not follow orders.
It was the biggest and most enormous dance of death of all times.
I was one of the many horses pulling the wagon and couldn't escape left or right because of the will of the driver.
I witnessed the gruesome workings of the machinery of death; gear meshed with gear, like clockwork
financed special research institutes investigating lethal gases and methods of execution.
I will leap into my grave laughing because the feeling that I have five million human beings on my conscience is for me a source of extraordinary satisfaction.
Whether they were bank directors or mental cases, the people who were loaded on those trains meant nothing to me. It was really none of my business.
I was never an anti-Semite.... My sensitive nature revolted at the sight of corpses and blood... I personally had nothing to do with this. My job was to observe and report on it.
Obeying an order was the most important thing to me. It could be that is in the nature of the German.
Because I have seen hell, death and the devil, because I had to watch the madness of destruction, because I was one of the many horses pulling the wagon and couldn't escape left or right because of the will of the driver, I now feel called upon and have the desire, to tell what happened.