You want to fall in love with a shoe, go ahead. A shoe can't love you back, but, on the other hand, a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either. And there are so many nice-looking shoes.
When the great history of trouble is written, my family will stand extremely high in the table of contents.
The whole city (Los Angeles) gives you the impression of impermanence. You have the feeling that one day someone is going to yell. Cut! Strike it! And then the stagehands will scurry out and remove the mountains, the movie-star homes, the Hollywood Bowl - everything.
Adultery - which is the only grounds for divorce in New York - is not grounds for divorce in California. As a matter of fact, adultery in Southern California is grounds for marriage.
Even if Scrabble had been invented then, I wouldn't have wanted to play Scrabble, because the highest triple word score in the world would not have expressed how much I liked the game Natalie and I played every afternoon.
Four times I looked for psychiatric help, and each time I arrived at the inescapable conclusion that the psychiatrist was crazier than I was.
Grandma cheated whenever she could. She cheated because it was a much more scientific and surer way of winning than trusting to luck.
I had moved out of the Edison Hotel because I couldn't pay the bill and was living at the Lincoln Hotel, where I couldn't pay the bill either, but it was cheaper.
I have always lived beyond my means. I am still trying to live beyond my means, but it is getting harder all the time. I am very rich.
I was having trouble making ends meet, and my beginnings weren't meeting either.
It's a play where something went wrong, 'Cause it's five hours, twelve minutes long. If you sit there, my friend, From beginning 'til end, Then your bladder better be strong!
Success is like winning the sweepstakes or getting killed in an automobile crash. It always happens to somebody else.