They wanted me to play third like Brooks so I did play like Brooks - Mel Brooks.
Every season has its peaks and valleys. What you have to try to do is eliminate the Grand Canyon.
I have an Alka Seltzer bat. You know, plop plop fizz fizz. When the pitcher sees me walking up there they say, 'Oh what a relief it is.'
Last year we had so many people coming in and out they didn't bother to sew their names on the backs of the uniforms. They just put them there with Velcro.
My biggest problem in the big leagues is that I can't figure out how to spend forty-three dollars in meal money.
It seems like Satan has thrown the DH into our game.
I knew he was trying to hit me, ... I asked the umpire to do something about it, but he did nothing. Our coach came out and asked him to issue a warning, but he didn't. The umpire did absolutely nothing about it.
I was leading off the inning, and the count was 2-0, so I was pretty sure he was going to throw a strike, ... I didn't think he wanted to walk me, so I was expecting one out over the plate.
I was disappointed because I don't think that was the right thing to do, ... It was partly the umpire's fault because it was evident the guy was throwing at him.
They saw what I can do, ... They know I can hit. The injury set me back a little bit, but I will have to just go to spring training and play the best I can play and just see what happens.
It's a lot like life. I think 99 percent of what goes on in life, we have very little control over.
I don't care what you do - baseball or politics - George W. Bush is always going to be compared to his father. I just want it to be an easy answer in 50 years - Who was the better player, me, or my kids? I want it to be my kids.