Jesus is a place-kicker and he's gonna kick you through the goal-posts of life.
Bill Allred
People who read my magazine wax their turtles all the time. - as Larry Flynt
people thetimes time
places life
Life is like a bowl of old bread.
life
I don't believe the government has a knobby.
government
You know, that's the first time I've ever been able to smell a website.
thetimes time
I'm gonna go home and spank the clown.
home
Thanks, Tonto, for your help.
help
They're 'fun bags' not 'feed bags!
fun
It's fun to watch butter on the hoof.
I'm Bill Allred, Painter of Light.
light
Being in love means never having to say 'giddy-up.
You know who Carrot-Top should be married to in a movie? Gallagher.
movies
You had your thumb up your butt and your mind was in Arizona
mind
You can't trust midgets, particularly gay-loving midgets.
trust
If it had been a pain in the ass, you wouldn't be pregnant now.
pain
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