The only way you can have it all is by delegating all the running of the home to other people - which I don't ever want to do.. So you do it yourself, and it takes time and energy and effort. And if you give it the time, it's profoundly enjoyable.
I do think that despite my best efforts to resist it, I am now a grown-up. It's due to lots of very difficult decisions that you make over a long period of time - about motherhood, wifehood, and work, and all the things that one has to make decisions about.
Tell him I mind having to look pretty, that's what I mind, because it is so much more of an effort.