Listen to me, goblin. You're stupid, let's accept that and move on.
Eoin Colfer
[Right now, on tour, Colfer is missing his wife and two kids but says it would be churlish not to appreciate the wonderful opportunities the Artemis Fowl books have presented him. At this point, he thinks he'll write two more books in the series and then he'll put Artemis to rest.] I'll be a bit sad when it happens. I've spent a lot of time in his company, but I have lots of other things I'd like to do... People are very supportive and it's not just a class thing - everybody, the common man can be creative and it's OK, you can be young and say, 'I'm writing a play', and people will say, 'Good on you'. Some other countries, they wouldn't take you seriously.
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Really, I'm trying to care, Artemis, really. But I thought it was all supposed to be over when the fat lady sings. Well, she's singing, but it doesn't appear to be over
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Artemis looked at Holly and felt a tremendous affection for her.. He could properly appreciate how fierce and beautiful his best friend was.. She is truly magical, thought Artemis. Perhaps her qualities are more obvious to me now that I have decided to sacrifice myself.
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How does she know it's the right room?' wondered Descant. Oh, I don't know; mabye it's the magical red glow coming from the doorway, or perhaps it's the deafening howl of the temporal winds.' said Mervall. Descant nodded.'You could be right, brother. And don't think I don't know sarcasm when I hear it.
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No, mademoiselle, I would not like to see the children's menu. I have no doubt that the children's menu itself tastes better than the meals on it. I would like to order? La carte. Or don't you serve fish to minors?
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I hear that you were on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?
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