You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren't dying. They're merging into big conglomerates.
No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.
When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.