People are so busy dreaming the American Dream, fantasizing about what they could be or have a right to be, that they're all asleep at the switch. Consequently we are living in the Age of Human Error.
Florence King
rights dreams american-dream age people human living dream dreaming busy asleep error american americaandamericans
Animal rights activists gives disillusioned feminists an excuse to go back to being women protecting wee creatures without compromising their radical credentials
women rights animals creatures excuse radical animal
Democracy: The Crude leading the Crud
democracy
Golf is tiddlywinks played while standing up and and wearing a hat
golf
Golf is an exercise in Scottish pointlessness for people who are no longer able to throw telephone poles at each other
people golf exercise
Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.
good morning sex smoking thing smoke
How can she grow up to be a lady if she's always got her nose in a book?
reading book grow lady nose books
A woman must wait for her ovaries to die before she can get her rightful personality back. Post-menstrual is the same as pre-menstrual; I am once again what I was before the age of twelve: a female human being who knows that a month has thirty day, not twenty-five, and who can spend every one of them free of the shackles of that defect of body and mind known as femininity.
women funny humor
Gradually my whole concept of time changed until I thought of a month as having twenty-five days of humanness and five others when I might just as well have been an animal in a steel trap.
Americans worship creativity the way they worship physical beauty - as a way of enjoying elitism without guilt: God did it.
guilt beauty creativity
No matter which sex I went to bed with, I never smoked on the street
funny humor feminism
In the South, Sunday morning sex is accompanied by church bells.
sex
In Mississippi the important thing is hooch, not bar equipment.
drinking
Showing up at school already able to read is like showing up at the undertaker's already embalmed: people start worrying about being put out of their jobs.
people
The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.
women life
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