Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
They might have occurred if either General Dreedle or General Peckem had once evinced an interest in taking part in orgies with him, but neither ever did, and the colonel was certainly not going to waste his time and energy making love to beautiful women unless there was something in it for him.
Women my wife's age with broken marriages take up robustly with fellows much younger than themselves, sometimes boys, and their husbands don't like that part of it at all.
Women don't suffer from penis envy. Men do.
The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.