I hate pulling out... I mean, I'm really bad at the whole parking thing....
If you love somebody set them free- it also works equally well if you hate somebody
The primary difference between sex and death is, with death there is no dress code
I hate carrying a torch, which is weird because otherwise I'm such a pyromaniac
The true genius of a Woman is her subtle flair in creating the illusion that you are the smart one
Does speed dating necessarily end up in a quickie divorce....?
the only drinking problem I've ever had, is figuring out why I'm still stuck in this salad spinner
I started to enjoy the regal sport of cockfighting... but I'm still having trouble getting the hang of windmilling the bayonet
When it comes to exacting revenge, it gets harder and harder to top yourself each successive time
it can't be wrong, if it feels so wrong
I've always been a poor sport and a sore loser...any other behavior might encourage a repeat performance
It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the blame