I liked you, cop. From the moment I met you. No not the first moment. I wanted to kill you when I first met you. But then I liked you. A lot.
J.R. Ward
Welcome to the wonderful world of jealousy, he thought. For the price of admission, you get a splitting headache, a nearly irresistable urge to commit murder, and an inferiority complex. Yippee.
funny humor thought world murder wonderful jealousy inferiority complex price
I was dead until you found me, though I breathed. I was sightless, though I could see. And then you came.. And I was awakened.
dead found
You've won the evolutionary lottery: You're a vampire. Let's go to Disneyland!
disneyland paranormal-romance vampire
Some things are destined to be -- it just takes us a couple of triesto get there.
fate destiny
But that was life: Nobody got a guided tour to their own theme park. You had to hop on the rides as they presented themselves, never knowing whether you would like the one you were in line for.. Or if the bastard was going to make you throw up your corn dog and your cotton candy all over the place.
funny humor fate life wisdom random life-lessons
You're such a pain in the ass. (Butch) Said the SIG to the Glock. (V)
funny humor friendship vampire
Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What's it spell? HEAD FUCK.- Jane
funny humor
Rule number four for me as a writer? Plotlines are like sharks: They either keep moving or they die. ~J.R. Ward
funny writing tips
Terrific. A bisexual dominant vampire with kidnapping expertise.
funny humor fiction romance paranormal vampire
Whoa. Fangs. She had fangs. She leaned in, prodded them a little. Eating with those puppies was going to take some getting used to, she thought. On impulse, she brought up her hands, turned her fingers into claws. Hissed. Cool.
Butch tightened his grip on his cell and wished there were an app that let you reach through a phone and bitch slap someone.
Funny thing about glass. When you broke the shit up, it got pissed and bit back.
Wrath: What the hell are you supposed to ask?Rhage: I know! Who do you like the most? It's me right?Come on, you know it is. Come oooooonnnnn-Butch: If its you, I'll kill myself.V: No, that just means she's blind. Rhage: It has to be me.V: She said she didn't like you at first. Rhage: Ah, but I won her over, which is more than anyone else can say about you, hot stuff.J.R.: I don't like anyone the bestWrath: Right answer. Rhage: She's just sparing all of you feelings. (grins, becoming impossibly handsome) She's so polite.J.R.: Next question?Rhage: Why do you like me the best?
funny humor black-dagger-brotherhood
Love, he realized, was like the daggers he made in his forge: When you first got one it was shiny and new and the blade glinted bright in the light. Holding it against your palm, you were full of optimism for what it would be like in the field, and you couldn't wait to try it out. Except those first couple of nights out were usually awkward as you got used to it and it got used to you. Over time, the steel lost its brand-new gleam, and the hilt became stained, and maybe you nicked the shit out of the thing a couple of times. What you got in return, however, saved your life: Once the pair of you were well acquainted, it became such a part of you that it was an extension of your own arm. It protected you and gave you a means to protect your brothers; it provided you with the confidnece and the power to face whatever came out of the night; and wherever you went, it stayed with you, right over your heart, always there when you needed it. You had to keep the blade up, however. And rewrap the hilt from time to time. And double-check the weight. Funny.. All of that was when it came to weapons. Why hadn't it dawned on him that matings were the same?(From the thoughts of Vishous)
marriage inspirational relationships romance
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