Online friends networks and dating sites, like the coffeehouse, are responding to the needs of introverts. We can write, not talk. We can get to the good stuff, and we can press delete as needed.
Laurie Helgoe
Let's clear one thing up: Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.
introversion
Introverts paradoxically pull away from culture and create culture.
Introvert integrity means going the distance for what we love: moving from apology to acceptance, from acceptance to acknowledgement, and from acknowledgment to activism.
Though introverts are drained by interaction, we can take immense pleasure in watching the scene around us.
This is why it is sometimes hard for introverts to find words: we really hate to compromise, and words are always a compromise.
A good rule of thumb is that any environment that consistently leaves you feeling bad about who you are is the wrong environment.
Introvert conversations are like jazz, where each player gets to solo for a nice stretch before the other player comes in and does his solo. And like jazz, once we get going, we can play all night. Extrovert conversations are more like tennis matches, where thoughts are batted back and forth, and players need to be ready to respond. Introverts get winded pretty quickly.
I prefer to interact with people one-on-one. Any more than that, and the dynamic becomes competitive.
Whatever kind of introvert you are, some people will find you too much in some ways and not enough in others.
Though some of us like to get on stage, many introverts are content to put on their invisibility cloaks and watch. But well-meaning extroverts will have none of that! They need to draw us out, invite us to participate repeatedly and question why we are so depressed as to not want to join.
For introverts, who have limited energy for interaction, we need to be more thoughtful and deliberate about whom we meet which, happily, is what we do best.
I believed that if I had the whole story, if I had the opportunity to really know the person I was sitting with, there would be nobody I could not love.
It takes an extrovert to bring out my upbeat side. If it were up to me, everyone would probably just sit around talking about mysteries of the universe.
I talk with many Shadow Dwellers who are mystified by the fact that chatty workers are rarely reprimanded. Sit and gossip and you are fun; close the door (if you have one) and you are antisocial.
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