Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with.
I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and I feel they should all worship me. That's what I told my kids. I think I must have been Adolf Hitler in a past life.
My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war. Just a greater emphasis on military apparel.
There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect
Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.
It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.
The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.
The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on
Know how to do anything - Im a mom
I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my job.
To expect life to treat you good is foolish as hoping a bull won't hit you because you are a vegetarian.
Excuse the mess, but we live here.
Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.
Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles.