Some people lose all respect for the lion unless he devours them instantly. There is no pleasing some people.
Etiquette means behaving yourself a little better than is absolutely essential.
Aristotle was famous for knowing everything. He taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons.
Just when you're beginning to think pretty well of people, you run across somebody who puts sugar on sliced tomatoes.
The trouble with the dictionary is that you have to know how a word is spelled before you can look it up to see how it is spelled.
I do not travel. I am not much of an extrovert, and I'm not much interested in extroverted objects. I do not care for the ideas of novelists. Novels are wonderful, of course, but I prefer newspapers.
The Dodo never had a chance. He seems to have been invented for the sole purpose of becoming extinct and that was all he was good for.
If a cat does something, we call it instinct; if we do the same thing, for the same reason, we call it intelligence.
Caesar might have married Cleopatra, but he had a wife at home. There's always something.
As you know statistics show that a certain number of people get married each year and the rest don't. Well, I got into the wrong bunch of statistics. I should be pitied instead of questioned.
He had also learned that there is no use murdering people; there are always so many left, and if you tried to murder them all you would never get anything else done.
As llamas have never heard of oxygen, they do not miss it.
Infant wart hogs resemble both sides of the family.
Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.
The stork is voiceless because there is really nothing to say.