Life is not a series of pathetic, meaningles actions. Some of them are so far from pathetic, so far from meaningless as to be beyond reason, maybe beyond forgiveness.
People who keep stiff upper lips find that it's damn hard to smile.
Depending on the reality one must face, one may prefer to opt for illusion.
People use people according to their own needs. Or don't use them. When a primary need is one of safety.