Some people are against porno movies. And I say hey, Ohio, Kentucky, and Iran: I say, hey - whatever a man, and a woman, and another woman with a penis and a midget do to a donkey, that's their garsh-darn business.
You know what my drink is? Jack Daniel's. Yes, that is a wild man drink. That should come with bail money, you know what I'm saying? Because on Jack, you don't know where you're going to end up, but you know when you get there, you won't be wearing any pants.
Every man wonders about the size of their penis. Laying in bed alone at night, or in a hammock with a parrot. You start thinking, Do I have a small penis or just gigantic balls?
You should've hung out, man.
If you see a man running down the street cock-flapping, you run with that man. 'Cause there is some scary shit coming the other way.
Sometimes you need a cigarette. Like after you have sex with a beautiful woman or a confused young man.