A brick could be used as a period on a really large sentence. A blanket could be used as a really large tilde sign.?
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A blanket could be used to suppress the will of the people. Every politician needs to keep this in mind when trying to retain power. Is America warm from the collected body heat, or from shared rage at being robbed from, lied to, and abused by the elite?
A blanket could be used as an inherently destructive force, if you can just get past the brick stage.?
A hotel is more than bricks and blankets. A hotel is a welcoming atmosphere, and a place to engage in a business transaction with a prostitute.?
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A brick is a mode of transportation, for a bug going nowhere in life.?
A brick could be used as an idol you can worship. But be careful, lest God smite thee with His wrath.?
Bricks could be used to build stronger relationships. But so could bribes.
A brick could be used in a knee replacement surgery, to build back the wall separating man from a sub four-minute mile. Damn you, Roger Bannister?
A brick could be used as a floating object that dispensed fresh water, if only it were lighter and shaped like a cloud.?
A brick could be used as a thick bumper sticker. Then if you get in a crash, you can blame it on the housing market and the element of irrational exuberance created by Alan Greenspan.?
A brick and a blanket could be combined to create a blink. And a half a blink, as we all know, is a wink. A wink and a smile might be enough to get you back to my blanket.?
A brick is a polarizing object. Especially if you find it at either the North or the South Pole.?
A brick could be held in one hand, and a stack of dollar bills in the other, to illustrate the difference in weight between the real and the imaginary. The imaginary only weighs more when you believe in it, and then once you stop believing in it, it weighs next to nothing.?
A blanket could be used as a tablecloth, to cover up illicit brick deals done under the table.?
Blankets are covers, covering the sins of my fathers.?
A blanket could be used to catch a hippopotamus. But you try it out first, and let me know if it works.?
A blanket could be used to trap my love in, before it dissipates out into the world.?
A blanket could be used instead of a blindfold when kidnapping someone. And the trunk of your car could be rented out like a cheap motel room to a midget.?
A jet may be perfect for breaking the speed of sound, but a brick is designed to break the speed of silence. Just listen to that quietness.?
A brick could be used as Bigfoot. You know, as something the people can really believe in.?
A brick could be used to support a wobbly table. Who got that table drunk, anyway?
A brick could be used to wipe your ass with. You know, if you already live someplace shitty.?
A blanket could be used as a stool softener. Or it could also be used to soften a chair.?
A brick could be used to cook with, as a thickening agent in gravy. But as history proves, the thickest agents work for the government as tax collectors.?
A brick could be a columnist for the New York Times, and could even win a Nobel Prize. And why not? Is that any more absurd than both those things happening for Paul Krugman?
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