I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television is its ephemerality.
P. J. O'Rourke
You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money.
poverty sharing generosity money people giving
If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.
products government selling
There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.
women funny humor men die thing
Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
reading good die read
Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.
teachers punishment schools teachersandteaching
television thing
Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
tests trouble people power society
There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon.
people
Some people say a front-engine car handles best. Some people say a rear-engine car handles best. I say a rented car handles best.
car people
I'm a registered Republican and consider socialism a violation of the American principle that you shouldn't stick your nose in other people's business except to make a buck.
principles people business
These were people who believed everything about the Soviet Union was perfect, but they were bringing their own toilet paper.
Everything on a boat has a different name than it would have if it weren't on a boat. Either this is ancient seafaring tradition or it's how people who mess around with boats try to impress the rest of us who actually finished college.
tradition boats people rest
I like to do my principal research in bars, where people are more likely to tell the truth or, at least, lie less convincingly than they do in briefings and books.
people truth
Some people are worried about the difference between right and wrong. I'm worried about the difference between wrong and fun.
rights wrongs people fun
The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
people government
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