A signature always reveals a man's character and sometimes even his name.
Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.
Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won't stand up either.
You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.
America believes in education the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
Statistician A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won't stand up either.
Walking isn't a lost art one must, by some means, get to the garage.
Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it
Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.
Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
[Anger is] the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind.
The quizzical expression of the monkey at the zoo comes from his wondering whether he is his brother's keeper, or his keeper's brother
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a rich widow
The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.
Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose.