Enjoy every ounce of your life, get high and be sincere to anybody that comes around you.
funny humor inspirational humorous-quotations
If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane(T-Shirt)
humorous-quotations
Froi heard Zabat's voice echo over and over again throughout the gorge. Wonderful. The gods had found a way of multiplying the idiot's voice.
Oh my God! You little slut! You want to have a good date with him and want to have ten thousand of his little baseball babies! Cassie!
funny humor humorous-quotations
Mr. And Mrs. Lowell are not receiving.'What the hell did that mean? 'I'm not throwing a forty-yard pass. I just have a few questions. I think their daughter is in danger.
Eventually my dad got home from work and set his briefcase down.'So. How was practice?' he asked'It was good. Why? Did you hear it wasn't?' I said, trying to keep my cool.'Son, no offense, but you play Little League. It's not the Yankees. I don't get daily reports about who's hitting the shit out of the ball
Does breakfast in bed count as a morning workout?
exercise humorous-quotations
My instructor was a skinny guy in his midtwenties who had a shaved head that was always peeling from sunburns and who could only have smelled more like marijuana if he'd been made of it. The training vehicle was a mid- '80s tan Nissan that had working breaks on the passenger side; He often got his jollies slamming them on for no reason and then between wheezing laughs saying 'You were all like 'I'm in control of the car' and then I hit the brakes and shit and you were all like 'whaaaat?
I'm writing a book on Procrastination. I hope to start it tomorrow. I've been thinking about it for almost six years now.
Did you ever notice how the words Attention and Alienation look the same when you are staring at them from a distance?
A fool will study for twenty or thirty years and learn how to do something, but a wise man will study for twenty or thirty minutes and become an expert. In this world, it isn't ability that counts, but authority.
Much of writing might be described as mental pregnancy with successive difficult deliveries. J.B. PRIESTLEY
I'm writing a new book called 'Ventroliquism for Dummies'.
God made him, and therefore let him pass for a man.
Carrot started to clap. It wasn't the clap used by middlings to encourage underlings to applaud overlings. It had genuine enthusiasm behind it which was, somehow, worse.
If they were afraid of him, then he must be Satan or something even worse, like maybe Sarah Palin.
This sucks the hind teat.
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