Friends don't menace friends with giant terrifying swords, okay?
Sarah Rees Brennan
My life was going to flash before my eyes, but it decided to hide behind my eyes and quake with terror instead.
funny humor life death fear terror eyes
I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.
funny humor sarcasm
Real life is sometimes boring, rarely conclusive and boy, does the dialogue need work.
funny humor real-life
funny humor friends
Want me to flex my magic for you, baby?
funny humor magic
Wearing that? Wouldn't you fancy a shapeless cardigan instead? You rock a shapeless cardigan, honey.
funny humor dad cute
You want useless, you have come to the right guy. I can be useless for hours at a time. Weeks even. I'm currently closing in on a month of being totally useless, which is by way of being a personal best.
funny humor personality
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