I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I'm under the table, after four I'm under my host.
funny humor drinking
We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.
funny humor drinking affection emotion alcohol
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
funny humor food drinking wine cooking
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so?There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
funny humor life jobs drinking
Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!
funny humor drinking alcohol
Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home.
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
funny humor belief drinking
To alcohol! The cause of.. And solution to.. All of life's problems
funny humor drinking alcohol homer
I am a drinker with writing problems.
funny writing drinking humour
Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.
funny drinking motto humour
It comes in pints?
funny drinking pippin movie-quote humour lord-of-the-rings-movie
Be wary of strong drink, it can make you shoot at the tax collector.. And miss.
inspirational drinking
Drinking would shut down my seeing and my hearing and my feeling.. Why would I want to be in the world if I couldn't touch the world with all of my senses intact?
life-and-living drinking senses alcohol
Next to music beer was best.
music drinking
Lead's erasing then vanishingBanished from whatever it is they're drinking and it's cleanedRunning from the pitcher as if it's her fantasy
poetry mystery clean imagination fantasy inspirational self-improvement changes lyrics dream dreaming purity drinking poem dreamer running changing metaphors pure rhyme drunk drink sobriety
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
philosophy drinking
Think of me as an impetuous Hegel, drunk with power, and also, regular drunk.
funny humor philosophy drinking
Ho! Ho! Ho! To the bottle I goTo heal my heart and drown my woeRain may fall, and wind may blowAnd many miles be still to goBut under a tall tree will I lieAnd let the clouds go sailing by
poetry sadness drinking liquor
After the first glass of vodkayou can accept just about anythingof life even your own mysteriousnessyou think it is nice that a boxof matches is purple and brown and is called La Petite and comes from Swedenfor they are words that you know and that is all you know words not their feelings or what they mean and you write because you know them not because you understand them because you don't you are stupid and lazy and will never be great but you do what you know because what else is there?
poetry writing drinking vodka
She was the third beer. Not the first one, which the throat receives with almost tearful gratitude; nor the second, that confirms and extends the pleasure of the first. But the third, the one you drink because it's there, because it can't hurt, and because what difference does it make?
women relationships drinking
There was a tacit understanding between them that 'liquor helped'; growing more miserable with every glass one hoped for the moment of relief.
relationships drinking alcohol liquor relief
I'd often slip and fall on the ice after last call, which explained the ever-present welts. If I were with a woman, I'd usually execute a precautionary vomit in the men's room in an effort avoid any ugly incidents once I got her back to her place. And they say chivalry is dead.
funny humor relationships drinking
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away.
silence solitude depression fear drinking loneliness addiction isolation
War and drink are the two things man is never too poor to buy.
war drinking
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