Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.
If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.
There's this big pie in show business, and you physically can't eat the whole pie. If you give everybody a slice of pie, you will still have more than enough. The real trick is not to try to get the whole pie, but to keep the biggest slice.
Here's something to think about How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'
You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.
You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh - it's as simple as that.
I think high self-esteem is overrated. A little low self-esteem is actually quite goodMaybe you're not the best, so you should work a little harder.
Go through your phone book, call people and ask them to drive you to the airport. The ones who will drive you are your true friends. The rest aren't bad people they're just acquaintances.
Your preoccupation should be on doing what you do as well as you can. What your co-workers say about you, what your opponent is doing that doesn't matter.
According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it.
In just two weeks, Bill Clinton will no longer be President of the United States. He'll just be another chubby, middle-aged guy annoying the waitresses at Hooters.
Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.
At his wife's 60th birthday party in Jackson Hole, Wyoming, Dick Cheney had a huge steak and battered onion rings for dinner. Afterwards he met with 100 donors, not campaign donors, heart donors.
CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.
The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up.
Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced they're getting back together. You know what that means? There's still hope for Ike and Tina Turner.
I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, I'd like some fries. The girl at the counter said, Would you like some fries with that?
Politics is just show business for ugly people
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
According to this week's Time magazine, President George Bush is a serious fitness buff. He works out 60 to 90 minutes a day with weights. Apparently he likes working out because it 'clears his mind.' Sometimes it works a little too well.
Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?
Today President Bush ordered an investigation into whether it is appropriate to have civilians with no experience running a Navy sub. Hey, how about an investigation into whether it's appropriate to have a civilian with no experience running the country?
(The Weakest Link) is fascinating program. They ask a bunch of people questions and they keep getting rid of the dumbest person, so just the smartest person is left. It is kind of the opposite way we elect a president.
President Bush said for security reasons, he's sworn off all e-mail communication. He will not be using email at the White House at all. Is that a good idea? I mean, it's not like that speaking thing was working out so good.