Dr. Evil The details of my life are quite inconsequential.. Very well, where do I begin My father was a relentlessly self improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum.. It's breathtaking I highly suggest you try it.
french life age genius evil childhood improving mother lessons lazy question spring insane drink father begin meat pretty possess lament details internationalrelations
I don't know why you use a fancy French word like dtente when there's a good English phrase for it cold war.
french war good word english cold
The twentieth century French dramatist Jean Anouilh wrote a play about Beckett which was made into a film in the 1960?s. In the film Richard Burton played the lead role of the archbishop of Canterbury. Now Beckett was before his calling a libertine, and w
french charity play film calling made beckett richard
The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall replied, 'In that case, there is no time to lose plant it this afternoon'
french time maturity growing lose tree great
Original French: Tout ce que nous connaissons de grand nous vient des nerveux. Ce sont eux et non pas d?autres qui ont fond? Les religions et compos? Les chefs d?uvre. Jamais le monde ne saura tout ce qu?il leur doit et surtout ce qu?eux ont souffert po
french original religions greatness-and-greatthings
I went to a restaurant that serves breakfast at any time. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
french funny humor thetimes time renaissance breakfast
I went to a fancy french restaurant called Deja Vu. Theheadwaiter said, Don't I know you?
french funny humor
I once went out with this wild girl. She made French toast and got her tongue caught in the toaster.
french history wild girl made tongue
I have tried to lift France out of the mud. But she will return to her errors and vomitings. I cannot prevent the French from being French.
french france return errors
One difference between French appeasement and American appeasement is that France pays ransom in cash and gets its hostages back while the United States pays ransom in arms and gets additional hostages taken.
french age difference france american cash arms
Tomatoes and oregano make it Italian wine and tarragon make it French. Sour cream makes it Russian lemon and cinnamon make it Greek. Soy sauce makes it Chinese garlic makes it good.
french chinese good wine russian greek
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.
french age language understand succeed paris idiots
The freedom fighters of Nicaragua.. Are the moral equal of our Founding Fathers and the brave men and women of the French Resistance.
women french men fathers moral resistance brave freedom
Women react differently: a French woman who sees herself betrayed by her husband will kill his mistress; an Italian will kill her husband; a Spaniard will kill both; and a German will kill herself.
women french woman german husband adultery kill
The American arrives in Paris with a few French phrases he has culled from a conversational guide or picked up from a friend who owns a beret.
french friend paris american americaandamericans
I am not the Prime Minister of French capitalism. I am the Prime Minister of France.
french capitalism france
The Irish are hearty, the Scotch plausible, the French polite, the Germans good-natured, the Italians courtly, the Spaniards reserved and decorous - the English alone seem to exist in taking and giving offense
french giving irish civilization exist offense country english germans
It all bottomed out with the Renaissance Period. Ren-ais-sance. Thats Renaissance, FRENCH for re-birth. Re-nais-sance. And thats why most of the Renaissance happened slap bang in the middle of FrItaly.
french comedy renaissance
I would have loved it - without the French
community french
The French peasant cuisine is at the basis of the culinary art. By this I mean it is composed of honest elements that la grande cuisine only embellishes.
french art honest cooking elements
You know it ain't easy <br/>For these thoughts here to leave me<br/>There's no words to describe it<br/>In French or in English<br/>Well, diamonds they fade<br/>And flowers they bloom<br/>And I'm telling you<br/>These feelings won't go away<br/>They've been knockin' me sideways<br/>They've been knockin' me out lately<br/>Whenever you come around me<br/>These feelings won't go away <br/>They've been knockin' me sideways<br/>I keep thinking in a moment that<br/>Time will take them away<br/>But these feelings won't go away.
french emotions life moment depression thoughts words feelings flowers thinking leave easy diamonds
Drunkenness was in good repute in England till Bloody Mary frowned upon it; it remained popular in Germany. The French drank more stably, not being quite so cold.
french drinking good mary popular drunkenness cold england germany drinks
The French and the British are such good enemies that they can't resist being friends
french enemies friends good british resist
If thou fill thy brain with Boston and New York, with fashion and covetousness, and wilt stimulate thy jaded senses with wine and French coffee, thou shalt find no radiance of wisdom in the lonely waste of the pinewoods
french wisdom fashion senses find wine brain waste lonely coffee
The headmistress was an able instructress in French and history and we learned with her as fast as fear could teach us.
french history fear teach learned teachersandteaching
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