And as Americans, we must ask ourselves: Are we really so different? Must we stereotype those who disagree with us? Do we truly believe that ALL red-state residents are ignorant racist fascist knuckle-dragging NASCAR-obsessed cousin-marrying road-kill-eating tobacco-juice-dribbling gun-fondling religious fanatic rednecks; or that ALL blue-state residents are godless unpatriotic pierced-nose Volvo-driving France-loving left-wing Communist latte-sucking tofu-chomping holistic-wacko neurotic vegan weenie perverts? <br/><br/>Yes. This is called diversity, and it is why we are such a great nation - a nation that has given the world both nuclear weapons AND SpongeBob SquarePants.<br/><br/>And so today I am calling upon both sides in the red-blue rift to reach out. Maybe we could have a cultural-exchange program between red and blue states. For example, a delegation from Texas could go to California and show the Californians how to do some traditional Texas thing such as castrate a bull using only your teeth, and then the Californians could show the Texans how to rearrange their football stadiums in accordance with the principles of feng shui (for openers, both goalposts should be at the west end of the field). Or maybe New York and Kentucky could have a college-style mixer, featuring special crossover hors d'oeuvres, such as bagels topped with squirrel parts.
funny politics principles diversity football world religious today end weapons nation special vegan texas americans calling california blue great red teeth ignorant west thing
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does
genius conversation dog special
Each day offers us the gift of being a special occasion if we can simply learn that as well as giving, it is blessed to receive with grace and a grateful heart.
gifts grace heart gift giving day grateful learn special blessed
When you're special to a cat, you're special indeed.. She brings to you the gift of her preference of you, the sight of you, the sound of your voice, the touch of your hand.
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To give without any reward, or any notice, has a special quality of its own.
quality giving special reward give
If one could conclude as to the nature of the Creator from a study of his creation it would appear that God has a special fondness for stars and beetles.
nature creation stars study special creator god
It is best, it seems to me, to separate one's inner striving from one's trade as far as possible. It is not good when one's daily break is tied to God's special blessing.
break good blessing special striving god trade
When the British Open is in Scotland, there's something special about it. And when it's at St. Andrews, it's even greater.
golf special open british scotland greater
To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. And number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special.
emotions life time happiness days thought tears joy day lives cry laugh special things
This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I have watched my crowds dwindle. I am going nowhere, and nowhere quick, but, those of you who have children, I am sorry to tell you this, but they are not special. Wait! I know some of you are going what, what? Let me just clarify: I know YOU think they're special.. Ha ha ha! I'm aware of that. I'm just here to tell you, that they're NOT! Ha ha ha ha! Sorry. Did you know that every time a guy comes he comes two-hundred million sperm? One out of TWO-HUNDRED MILLION that load, we're only talking about one load connected: gee, what are the fucking odds? Do you know what that means? I've wiped nations off've my chest with a grey gymsock. ENTIRE CIVILISATIONS HAVE FLAKED AND CRUSTED IN THE HAIR AROUND MY NAVEL! [..] I've tossed universes in my underpants while napping. Boom! A Milkyway shoots into my jockeyshorts: Unngh.. What's for fucking breakfast!
funny nations idea time past children unknown talking special wait hair crowds breakfast guy humour aware
I know quite certainly that I myself have no special talent; curiosity, obsession and dogged endurance, combined with self-criticism, have brought me to my ideas.
talent self-knowledge inspirational curiosity obsession endurance ideas special
Journalism's ultimate purpose [is] to inform the reader, to bring him each day a letter from home and never to permit the serving of special interests.
information purpose home day journalism serving special letter interest reader interests ultimate
A job on a newspaper is a special thing. Every day you take something that you found out about, and you put it down and in a matter of hours it becomes a product. Not just a product like a can or something.
jobs day special found matter job newspapers thing newspaper
Another segment of society that has constructed a language of its own is business... [The businessman] is speaking a language that is familiar to him and dear to him. Its portentous <br/>nouns and verbs invest ordinary events with high adventure; the executive walks among ink erasers caparisoned like a knight. This we should be tolerant of--every man of spirit wants to ride a white horse... A good many of the special words of business seem designed more to express the user's dreams than to express his precise meaning.
dreams adventure man business society language meaning spirit good words events ordinary ride special speaking knight white horse express ink
I decided, very early on, just to accept life unconditionally; I never expected it to do anything special for me, yet I seemed to accomplish far more than I had ever hoped. Most of the time it just happened to me without my ever seeking it.
life thetimes time accomplish seeking special early accept
Life becomes precious and more special to us when we look for the little everyday miracles and get excited about the privileges of simply being human
life miracles human special precious
We are not special. We are not crap or trash, either. We just are. We just are, and what happens just happens.
life special
Looking back you realize that a very special person passed briefly through your life- and it was you. It is not too late to find that person again.
life past person find special realize
Twentieth-century Russian literature has produced nothing special except perhaps one novel and two stories by Andrei Platonov, who ended his days sweeping streets.
literature days stories special russian streets
Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.
life beauty loneliness night special air smell burn sunsets
The only thing I know is everything you love will die. The first time you meet that someone special, you can count on them one <br/>day being dead and in the ground.
time count special dead die love thing
Love is a special word, and I use it only when I mean it. You say the word too much and it becomes cheap.
word special cheap love
We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special.
science inspirational universe understanding mankind special understand star planet monkeys
Man is a special being, and if left to himself, in an isolated condition, would be one of the weakest creatures; but associated with his kind, he works wonders
wonders man kind mankind works creatures special left
One reason why mathematics enjoys special esteem, above all other sciences, is that its laws are absolutely certain and indisputable, while those of other sciences are to some extent debatable and in constant danger of being overthrown by newly disco
danger reason laws special mathematics
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