You are what you eat...I'm a cunt!
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There is no accounting for taste and no taste for accounting.
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The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.
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Without depression and anxiety, I would not be who I am; a person who can see beauty and humour in the smallest and least likely of things; appreciating others kindness tenfold. When the black clouds of despair descend and life seems pointless I try to remember that one day in the future, perhaps this very day, a gentle breeze will blow the clouds away and allow the sunshine in. When that happens the world is a new and magical place and I wish to live forever.
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Its not easy being a man you know. I had to get dressed today and there are other pressures.
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Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.
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Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.
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Prudent people are very happy; 'tis an exceeding fine thing, that's certain, but I was born without it, and shall retain to my day of Death the Humour of saying what I think.
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War is a game that is played with a smile. If you can't smile, grin. If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can.
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When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
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His humour is very much like his movies, one-liners, fast, off-the-cuff stuff. He's always been like that.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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How many husbands have I had? You mean apart from my own?
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Look, there's no metaphysics on earth like chocolates.
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I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
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Well, don't expect us to be too impressed. We just saw Finnick Odair in his underwear.
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Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
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I have never listened to anyone who criticized my taste in space travel, sideshows or gorillas. When this occurs, I pack up my dinosaurs and leave the room.
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The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache.
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I don't hate people. I just feel better when they aren't around.
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When I was your age, television was called books.
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If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.
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A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
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Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping.
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If you're too open-minded; your brains will fall out.
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